Into the Clyde-rverse

I believe the children are our future. Teach them well and let them lead the way. Show them all the beauty they possess inside... [Sigh.] Ever since I got sick, I can't stop thinking about the negative affect my diagnosis could have on kids.

When I first found out I'd have to undergo chemo, it wasn't my side effects I was concerned about as much as those that the little ones on our street, at the bus stop, or the local restaurant would have to endure. The thing is, I've always been able to discern the distorted look of simultaneous curiosity and concern in a young child's face when they see someone that looks unwell. There's a hint of pain there. As if it breaks just the tiniest part of their belief that the world is one big, happy, magic-unicorn-filled sparkle party. And, dammit, it just couldn't be ME to send THAT kinda message. I'm the master of ceremonies in that universe!

So far, I feel like I've done the best I could do given the circumstances. I've worn beautiful, fun wigs almost every time I've gone outdoors since buzzcut day and, when I haven't, I've sported the most spunky and fashionable head wraps that I'm basically expecting a phone call from the local fashion editor. Trouble is, my young nephew is now coming to town and I want nothing more than to not, well... scare him.  

He's the smartest, sweetest three-and-a-half-year-old little Italian nugget you could ever share a bowl of bolognese with. And the last time I saw him in January for my 40th birthday, I looked like me. Listen, I know most of my worries are completely irrational. His brain is likely still far too young to form too strong of an opinion of who exactly is Auntie Lee Lee and whether or not she's a blonde, redhead, or just plain schizophrenic. But it's still got me in PR narrative management mode like I'm trying to spin the latest Kardashian mishap before it becomes too distasteful a tabloid headline.

So I made a video. It's for my Clyde. My Clyderman. My big boy who will give me big loving hugs in just a few more days when my beautiful family comes to visit. My little buddy who, I hope, will smile along with me, have some silly fun, and will know that Auntie Lee Lee is JUST the same cuckoo bird she's always been. Or maybe even more so. 

And to all the other little Clydermen and Clydergirls out there who may see another Auntie Lee Lee out and about someday... just know, all we need are two TINY little things whence we meet to make us feel oh-so-much better: a wink and a smile. 

And the sparkle party rages on... 💋🦄✨🎆